Finding Myself
by Beatles4evaGLEE
Summary: Darren Criss is 25 and is suddenly confused about who he is. He once said that people fall in love with people, not gender. This story puts that statement to the test. Follow me on Twitter, @ Starkidding
1. Chapter 1

Darren Criss had always been gifted. He had wonderful parents, music flowed from his fingers like magic, he had amazing friends and he had an great character to play on a great TV show. He thought he knew knew himself. He did know himself. But, he was missing something. He didn't know what, but there was definitely something missing in his life. Darren definitely had enough money. Numerous people loved him. He missed his _Starkid Productions _friends. But he was still a part of them. Always would be.

"_the time we have to spend apart will keep us in each other's hearts"_

Joey. Joey Richter. Maybe he could talk to Joey about his unknown problem. He called Joey on his Iphone at 8:03 . He waited... Waited... Waited... Joey's mom picked up.

"_Oh, hey Mama Richter, is Joey there?" _Darren asked politely. The hot sun of Las Angeles was beating down on his overly-gelled head.

"_Hello, Darren. Sorry, Dare, he isn't. He's out with Dylan and Joe. I'll get him to call when he's back. It's nice to hear from you, Darren. You're doing so well!_" She said. Darren could feel her warm smile through the phone.

"_Okay, great. Thank you, I miss you guys so much. I have to go. Get Joey to call me later." _Darren said shortly.

"_Okay, bye, Darren. I love you. Have fun on TV" _she giggled. Darren said goodbye and hung up. He cursed under bis breath.

A typical day at _Glee _began at 5 AM and lasted about 16 hours. Today was no different. Except today he and Chris were shooting a kissing scene. Darren had hated kissing scenes ever since The First Time. The first scene with him was fine, it was adorably fluffy. But the second, he had to talk about masturbating. And ripping off clothes. And having sex. He even had to moan into a kiss. The kiss on the stage? Hell, that was totally awkward because he tried to cry but couldn't. Then he had to kiss Chris. Again. He was so short compared to Chris! It was almost embarrassing for him. During the sex scene, he go a boner. Try explaining that to your crew, costar and director. It was supposed to be cute, adorable, fluffy sex. Not hot and thrusty at all. Chris just laughed through the awkwardness of the strange moment. 

Because Chris still hadn't forgiven Darren for the Dublin Kiss, he figured it was karma. But Chris was just as embarrassed as Darren. For the sex scene was supposed to be kind, sweet, heart melting. Not like it would be later in their fandom's dirty mind. Chris would never willingly admit it, but he was still a virgin. His loving parents knew he was, but none of his co-stars did. In The First Time, he felt like he was losing hi virginity. Especially with Darren's erection and all.

They were shooting the kiss at nine o'clock and it was 9:27. It didn't normally take this long but Darren kept messing it up. In Darren's mind, he was giving it his all, being sexy. According to Ryan Murphy, Darren looked like a crocodile. "Darren, don't eat Chris. He is not a burrito. And Chris, Kiss back!" he yelled.

"But Kurt is caught by surprise." Chris reasoned.

Ryan rolled his eyes. "Look, I don't care if you're in the shower or on a cliff, Kurt is going to kiss his boyfriend back. You do the same!" he said lazily. Ryan sighed a deep sigh. "Take 23," he shouted.

Chris thought for a second. Was Ryan implying that he and Darren were dating? Chris never thought of Darren as anything more than a best friend. But come to think of it, Darren had become uncomfortable around Chris. Ever since the start of the Glee Tour. He thought that since Darren was a regular, he was taking his work more seriously. According to Chris, he and Darren were just the best of friends. Chris thought Darren felt the same way.

"How could you? You kissed him!" Chris yelled, being Kurt.

"I didn't kiss him! He kissed me!" Darren yelled, being Blaine.

"I saw you two. You kissed back." Chris paced the floor.

"No I didn't! You saw things wrong! Sebastian means nothing to me!" Darren grabbed Chris's shoulders, making them look at each other.

Chris tore from Darren and looked in the full-body mirror. "The fact is, Blaine, I just don't feel as close as we used to." he looked down into Darren's hazel eyes. "I mean.. before you met Sebastian."

When everyone was taking a break and a scene as taking a long time, the other costars would come sit down, read their lines and watch. Lea, Diana, Cory, Naya and Chord came to watch.

"Is this close enough for you?" Darren pulled Chris from the waste into a deep kiss, tongue and all. Chris brought his had up to Darren's face, feeling Darren's gelled hair.

"Cut" yelled Ryan.

The kiss lasted three seconds after he yelled cut.

Three seconds.

The five guest's mouth's dropped. Lea was the most surprised. She'd have something to bug them about later.

Chris and Darren broke away. Darren tried to hide his proud smirk and Chris tried not to smile. He smiled when he was nervous or embarrassed.

"Take five. No, make it ten. You guys will turn it into ten if I give you five so I'm giving you ten. Break!" Ryan shouted.

Chris walked off the set. He ran to his trailer. He kinda wanted to cry. He was so confused. What as that, anyway? Caught in the acting? Or was it he and Darren's true colours coming out? He texted Lea.

Chris: **Lea, I'm warning you. You have a very bad habit of tweeting more than you should. If you say anything about this I am getting a restraining order on you! And I'm unfollowing you!**

Lea: **Don't worry, Chris. This is important and private. I know better. The sexy kiss is safe with me ;-) **

Chris rolled his eyes at the text. **Seriously. I will hunt you down, Michele. **

Lea chuckled. **Go ahead, Colfer. :-)**

Chris drank water and took a minute to feed his sea monkeys. Darren came in. "Hey, Chris, can we talk?" he asked. He looked so gleeful. He was beaming.

"Not now." said Chris. Darren looked confused. "I have to feed my sea monkeys! And I promised to do questions and answers on twitter. " Chris grabbed his IPhone and sat down. "God, I hate these jeans! They're way too tight! I can barely walk and breath" he complained.

Darren glanced at Chris's butt. "I think they look _great._" Darren said. Chris looked at Darren, almost in disgust. "Hey, I forgot my phone at home, can I use yours for a second?" Darren asked.

"Sure, go ahead." Chris handed him the phone. "The pass word is 3211." he said. 

"any particular reason?" Darren asked.

"It all adds up to seven. The magic number. Did you know that if you put 7 evens on top of each other you get a lightening bolt?" Chris said logically.

"Yup, you'd be a Ravenclaw. You're so smart, all those numbers." Darren smiled. He went onto Twitter.

"I know, right. I'm Cho-Chang, Y'all. You'd be a Hufflepuff. You don't really hate. You always _FIND_ the way out of mazes. The only time I've seen you lose it is when you were on Potions Master. You were either drunk, really irritable or it was a skit" Chris said honestly. He sipped a can of diet coke. "Oh, by the way, how's Mia?" Chris asked.

"She -uh- she's good." Chris could tell something was on Darren's mind.

"I won't tell her about the kiss. I don't want anyone knowing about it." Chris said.

"Thats what I wanted to talk to you about." Darren said.

"What do you mean? Can I have my phone back?" Chris asked. He was slightly confused. He went on twitter and saw that Darren had said "_DarrenCriss 's in my trailer! Time to ppaarrttyyy_" Chris rolled his eyes. "Darren!" he squealed. He didn't even bother changing the password.

Darren smirked. "Hey, you learned. Anyways, how old were you when you found out you were gay?" Darren asked.

Chris furrowed his eyeborows. "I, uh, I was 15 when I came out to my parents, but I was bullied in school for being gay and my high voice practically all my life." he said. He answered some questions to his eager fans.

"how did you know you were – er are?" Darren asked.

"I think I was about 13 when I realized I wasn't like the other boys in my school. I had a crush on this guy named Paul." Chris said. "Why are you asking me all these questions?" Chris said. He was really confused.

"I.. I don't know. I'm having trouble finding myself." Darren aid quietly.

"Well.. lets go before we Kurt moves to New York and Blaine dies." said Chris shortly.

He stepped outside the trailer in front of Darren. Darren put on his pink sunglasses and shamelessly stared at Chris's ass. His ass in those tight jeans, oh. Super hot.

They moved on to a choir room scene. Chris and Darren sat next to each other, holding hands. Darren looked lovingly at Chris, and vice versa. Lea sang a song with Cory on the drums. It was a love song. Darren made definite eye contact with Chris. Darren eyes, not Blaine eyes.

After work, Chris and Darren went to Darren's for a bit. They had some tea, watched '_The Voice_' and got their dork on in the living room. Talking and talking about Harry Potter, Starkid's new musical '_Holy Musical __BMan_'. Suddenly, Darren got a look on his face that Chris couldn't read. "You know how earlier you said you don't know who you are anymore?" Chris asked. Darren nodded. "Well, I'll tell you who you are. You are a talented man who has a degree in acting, you can play the guitar, piano, violin, mandolin,"

"And the harmonica" Darren boasted.

"That doesn't count. Anyone can play that." Chris smiled. "You have millions of fans. But you're not just Darren Criss. You're Toby Phillips, Harry Freakin' Potter, Blaine Anderson. You are this amazing person and everyone loves you. Even Kermit The Frog loves you. I think you could give Miss Piggie a run for her money. And you were on Broadway." Chris giggled awkwardly. Darren sat there emotionless. "I.. I should go. See you tomorrow, Dare." Chris smiled.

"Bye, Chris. See you in the morning." Darren walked Chris to the door. Chris went downstairs, into his car and drove home. What did he do? Did he just make working with his co-star awkward? Was he leading Darren on? No. No. Just, no. Darren was straight. They were just playing. Darren felt lost, and it's Chris's job to help Darren find himself. That's what good friends do, right?

When Chris got home, he didn't even bother taking a shower. He just got undressed and went straight to bed. Was he getting feelings for Darren? Was Darren getting feeling for Chris? He was very confused. He walked int the door at 11 and didn't fall asleep till 1:30. Extra coffee in the morning.

When Chris got to work, Lea was waiting for him with coffee in her hand. One for Chris, one for herself. Darren was awake and ready to act and sing.

"I heard you went to Darren's last night." Lea had a disproving look on her face.

"Yes, and?" Chris said. He was still very tired.

"What happened? You know it's not a good idea to get into relationships with co-stars or colleges." Lea said. She tapped her foot impatiently.

"Nothing happened! Darren is straight! We were just talking and being dorky nerds! Lay off!" Chris said.

"Drink more coffee. You need it. Chris, I'm telling you. It's not a good idea." Lea demanded.

"Oh, the same way you kinda slept with Cory and sorta – kinda – really – made out with Diana?" Chris shot at her.

"You know very well that those are only half true. _Rachel _slept with Finn. I kissed Diana. While I was drunk." Lea rolled her eyes.

"Whatever." Chris sipped his coffee. "It needs more cream." he sighed.

Darren walked up to Chris. It seemed that Darren had a few too many coffees. "Hi Chris!" he said eagerly. 

"Oh my god." Chris rolled his eyes and got another cup of coffee. 

"What's the matter? Is my awesomeness too much for you?" Darren said. He put his pink sunnies on.

"No. It's not that. I didn't get much sleep last night." Chris groaned.

"You were up late too?" Darren asked. He walked next to Chris. They picked up their script's and began reading them.

"Yeah. I'm don't understand anything." Chris skimmed through the book of lines. "Oh, look. Another kissing scene. It seems like it's just a peck."

"I don't either, I mean, you just randomly went home." Darren said. He picked up a cup of coffee and sipped it.

"Darren. That was my cup." Chris said in a mono tone. Darren blushed. "Oh well. Darren, I went home because I felt like I overstayed my welcome." Chris said. He read through his scenes and highlighted his lines. He took a gulp of the Darren – Sipped coffee.

Darren did the same. "Chris, you could never do that at my place." He said romantically.

Chris sighed. He didn't know what to say. What was he doing? Darren was a really good friend. _A friend_. "A friend." Chris said quietly.

Darren looked confused. "Huh?" he said. What the hell was Chris talking about.

"Oh, was that out loud?" Darren nodded. "Well, you're my friend. My good friend. We see each other every day, I don't see why I went over yo your apartment last night." Chris said coldly. He made up a story.

"_Because _you're my good friend. It's like.. students see their friends outside of school." Darren said. 

"Yes, but school isn't 16 hours long." Chris snapped. Darren was silent. "I'm sorry. I guess I'm still really tired. Lets go through our lines." Chris suggested.

"No. Let me get you some coffee. I'm about to get myself some anyway." Darren said. He shrugged his shoulders.

"Okay, _you _don't need anymore coffee, Mister." Chris said. He sat, read his lines and waited for Darren to bring him coffee. 

Darren came back. Chris looked like an entirely different person. He looked a bit happier. "Here's the coffee, Mr. Colfer." Darren smiled brightly.

"Thanks. Lets go over our lines." Chris said.

"Which scene?" Darren asked.

"Act three, part 6, beginning with 'Look, I'm sorry.' Ready?" Chris said.

"Yup, you first. The line is yours. Lets, chair – act." Darren suggested.

"Okay." Chris cleared his voice. "Look, I'm sorry, Blaine. I know you loathe Sebastian almost as much as I do. I know he initiated the kiss. But.. Why did you kiss back?" Chris said. He didn't make eye contact with Darren.

"Kurt, how many times do I have to tell you, I didn't kiss back?" Darren said a bit loudly.

"You keep saying that, but I don't really see it. I saw you."

"Kurt, let's not fight anymore. If I did kiss back, I'm sorry. I didn't mean it. I only want to be with you." Darren and Chris looked each other in the eyes. They leaned forward and kissed. More than a peck.

"Whoa!" said Chris when the kiss ended. Mia walked in just in time to see the kiss. 

"H..Hey Dare!" she smiled. She gave Darren a peck.

"Hey, Mia. What are you doing here?" Darren said as if the kiss between he and Chris never happened.

"I just stopped by to see how you're doing. Or who, is a better question." She said a bit rudely.  
>"Oh, we're just going over our lines." Chris said. "See?" he tried to make sure Darren wasn't in trouble.<p>

"I see.. but it says a peck. That didn't look like a peck. That lasted about three seconds." She glared at Chris, then smiled at Darren.

Darren stood up. "Sorry Scene, Chris, Darren!" yelled Brad.

"C'mon, Chris. Let's do this." said Darren eagerly. He gave Mia a kiss goodbye. Chris could tell Darren didn't really want to give Mia the kiss.

They filmed the scene. It was almost perfect on the first shot. They kissed. They kissed again. Brad made them kiss so many times it was almost porn. "Aaanndd cut! Perfect, guys. Lets go through the big music number."

After doing the music number, it was time to film the next episode. It was a busy day. They finished at around nine - nine thirty. By the time Chris got home, he was beat. Darren called him up. Chris decided not to answer. Then Darren texted him. Again, he ignored it.

Darren was confused. Why wasn't Chris answering? He began to make excuses for Chris. The phone was dead, the cell was off. Easy. Finally, Joey called back. Darren picked up, his voice cracked.

"_Hey, man_." Joey said excitedly.

"_Hi._" Darren said in a tired voice.

"W_hat time is it there?_" Joey felt bad.

"_um.. ten to eleven._" Darren said.

"_Shit, dude, I should have called sooner. I'm sorry, man." _Joey said.

"_Naw man, it's fine. What's up?"  
><em>

"_I believe you're the one who asked me to call."_

_"Oh.. Right.. I fixed that."_

_"what was the matter?"_

_"I'm kinda lost. I don't know anything anymore. I think I need help."  
><em>_  
>"What is troubling you?"<em>

_"I have no clue."_

_"Well.. Go to sleep. If you're still confused when you wake, come see me on the weekend. Only one more day."_

_"Bye, Richter."_

_"Bye Criss." _They hung up. Darren sighed and went back to sleep.

He woke up an hour late. Drove to '_GLEE_' as fast as he could. He quickly got his hair gelled, got into purple pants, a black tucked in top and a pink and purple bow tie. They smoothed out his skin tone and applied a little bit of guy-liner. He let out a deep sigh and drank his coffee. It would feel like a _llooonnnggg_ time till the weekend.


	2. Chapter 2

When Darren arrived at Glee, he saw Chris talking with Lea. He heard them giggling as usual. Both with coffee in hand. He refilled his to-go mug of coffee and began memorizing his lines. Choir room scene where everyone was quiet but Lea, Matt and Cory. His new favourite kind of scene.

It's not that he didn't like working on glee. He freaking loved it! It was the best show and job ever! But he was very confused and scared. Chris was his best friend. All of the Glee Cast were buddies, but Chris and Darren shared a bond together. It was special. And Darren wasn't going to do anything to mess that up. He loved it.

But Chris was what was confusing him.

Or was it just Darren's own strange mind...

He knew he was crazy. There's no doubt about it. He wrote and starred in a musical about Harry Potter. And he wrote the music for a musical about aliens, AND a musical about penis's and vagina's. When there was a night about him on TV, the first thing he'd mention is his brothers band.

His brother.

Maybe he should give Chuck a call sometime. He gave Joey a text saying he couldn't come up, but that they should Skype. He did the same to his brother Chuck.

Chris saw Darren staring off into space. He walked over to the short, curly haired boy. "Darren? Are you okay? You've been staring off into space for like fifteen minutes."

Chris said. He waved his hand in front of Darren's eyes.

"Oh, what? Sorry! I was uh, I was just thinking." said Darren. It's true. He wasn't lying.

"Deep thoughts?" Chris scoffed.

"I'm a thinker." Darren smiled.

_A thinker? What the fuck is that?_ Darren thought to himself.

"Haha, that you are, Dare. That you are." Chris laughed. "Come on. Let's go to the choir room. We're all on."

"CHRIS! DARREN! COME ON! LETS GET THE SHOW ON THE ROAD!" yelled Ryan Murphy.

They ran to the artificial choir room. Matthew Morrison was sitting his his stool in front of the rest of the cast as he waited for the missing boys. Lea glared and Chris, who stuck his tongue out at her. The entire cast laughed.

"And, rolling!" yelled Mr. Murphy.

"Okay, guys, Nationals is coming up and we need to get prepped! We need a song selection. I have an idea-" Matt was cut off by Chris.

"Mr. Schue, can we PLEASE not do what we ALWAYS do? I think I speak for all of us when I say we all want a shot to sing. You always have us do a group number, Rachel and/or Finn singing lead, then Rachel and Finn do a ballad. We need to mix it up!" Chris used a whole lot of hand motions.

"Yeah, Kurt's right. I can't remember the last time I even had my own line of a song." Jenna frowned.

"See, what we need is my perfect Hispanic voice. Rrrr" Naya rolled her r's.

Lea looked at everyone in panic. "But that way we won't win!"

"Rachel, we have a better shot at winning if we all sing. Everybody is tired of you two singing everything and not giving us a chance." Chris and Lea looked at each other in the eyes.

"Even the judges? I doubt that." Lea rolled her eyes.

"Especially the judges! I work just as hard as you to get a solo, but you seem to find something wrong with all of our voices, then convince Mr. Schue to let you sing. I'm sick and tired of it!" Chris shouted.

"Kurt. The principle's office." Matt glared. 

Chris stood up and glared at the entire choir room. "Goodbye, Rachel." he stormed off to the office.

Darren watched Chris leave then looked at everyone awkwardly.

"Alright, moving on." Matt said.

"CUT! That was perfect guys, great!" Ryan smiled. "Lea and Cory up now! Lea and Chris next."

Chris went back and gave Lea a big hug. He left the set to get some coffee and something to eat. Next, he had to go to the recording studio. He had a song to sing with Darren. Humming Bird Heartbeat by Katy Perry.

It took a few tries. Chris's voice kept going up too high when it wasn't supposed to, but on the 7th try (Chris somehow knew this try would work) they got. it.

Chris: _You make me feel like I'm losing my virginity__  
><em>_The first time every time when you touch me__  
><em>_I make you bloom like a _flower_that you never seen__  
><em>_Under the sun we are one buzzing energy__  
><em>

Strangley, Darren made quick eye contact with Chris while singing. He didn't want to be too obvious, but it kinda was. Adam Anders looked at Darren funnily, but neither men noticed.

Darren: _Let's pollinate to create a family tree__  
><em>_This evolution with you comes natural_

Chris: _Some _call_it science we call it chemistry__  
><em>_This is the story of the birds and the bees_

__Chris: _And even when seasons change__  
><em>_Our love still stays the same___

Together:_You give me the hummingbird heartbeat__  
><em>_Spread my wings and make me fly__  
><em>_The taste of your honey is so sweet__  
><em>Chris:_When you give me the hummingbird heartbeat, hummingbird heartbeat__  
><em>Darren: _Oh oh__  
><em>Chris: _Hummingbird heartbeat__  
><em>Darren: _Oh oh__  
><em>Chris: _Hummingbird heartbeat___

Darren: _I've flown a million miles just to find a magic seed__  
><em>_A white flower with the power to bring life to me__  
><em>_You're so exotic my whole _body_fluttering__  
><em>_Constantly craving for a taste of your sticky sweet___

Chris: _I was on the brink of a heart attack__  
><em>_You gave me life and keep me coming back__  
><em>_I see the sun rise in your eyes, your eyes__  
><em>_We've got a future full of blue skies, blue skies_

_And even when seasons change  
>Our love still stays the same<em>

Together:_You give me the hummingbird heartbeat  
>Spread my wings and make me fly<br>The taste of your honey is so sweet  
>When you give me the hummingbird heartbeat, hummingbird heartbeat<br>_Darren: _Oh oh  
><em>Chris:_Hummingbird heartbeat  
><em>Darren: _Oh oh  
><em>Chris:_Hummingbird heartbeat_

Chris:_You love me, you love me  
>Never love me not, not, oh no<br>_Darren:_When we hear a perfect harmony  
>You make me sound like, like a symphony<em>

Chris:_Spread my wings and make me fly  
><em>Darren:_The taste of your honey is so sweet  
><em>Together:_When you give me the hummingbird heartbeat, hummingbird heartbeat  
><em>Chris:_You give me the hummingbird heartbeat  
><em>Darren:_Spread my wings and make me fly  
><em>Chris:_The taste of your honey is so sweet  
><em>Together:_When you give me the hummingbird heartbeat, hummingbird heartbeat  
><em>Darren: _Oh oh  
><em>Chris: _Hummingbird heartbeat  
><em>Darren: _Oh oh  
><em>Chris: _Hummingbird heartbeat  
><em>Darren: _Oh oh  
><em>Chris: _Hummingbird heartbeat  
><em>Darren:_Oh oh  
><em>Chris: _Hummingbird heartbeat _

Adam smiled and clapped when he stopped the recording. "That's perfect, guys. Great!"

On the way out, Chris nudged Darren's shoulder. He smiled. He liked being around Darren. Darren was Chris's best friend – they just worked together. They.. They had a great bond. Sure, he had a bond with all the cast mates but there was a special and stronger bond with Darren.

"What were those looks for?" Chris asked, not wanting to be awkward, but was awkward any way.

"what looks?" Darren asked obliviously. He knew what Chris was talking about, but didn't want to start something awkward. _Friendship first, Darren. Relationship second._ He thought to himself.

Chris scoffed. "Riigghhtt. The whole.. squint-when-you-sing get-into-character thing, right? You honestly make the BEST facial expressions." Chris laughed.

"I do not! I just.. sing. With passion. How song writer supposed to sing.." Darren defended himself. "But you CRY when you sing. But then it's so high you could break glass..." Darren smirked.

"Hey!" Chris took offense to this. That bitch..

"I'm sorry, that was mean. Your voice is lovely. My apologies.." Darren smiled at Chris. He tried to be a gentleman.

"You best be sorry, Mr. Triangle." Chris smirked.

Darren scrunched his eyebrows to hi middle forehead. "What? What are you talking about?" He was confused.

"Oh, you know what I'm talking about." Chris smirked. Darren looked at him blankly. "Your eyebrows? They're perfect triangles!" Chris smiled and giggled. Some could consider this flirting..

"They're just... shaped. They have body. What's wrong with that?" Darren smiled and pushed Chris lightly with his shoulder.

"Nothing. And voices slightly higher than other men?" Chris raised an eyebrow at his costar.

"Slightly?"

"Fine. I sound like a girl. Even toddlers know it..." Chris sighed.

"Well... An amazing girl." Darren triedto comfort.

Chris starred blankly at Darren. "Not helping, Dare."

Darren smiled and shook his head. _I know.. what do you want me to say? I just want you to know I love you the way you are._ Darren thought.

They walked to the set, smiles on faces. Lea smiles when she saw them. _I guess they would be cute together,_ she thought. She took out her phone and tweeted.

"The most PERFECT song done by DarrenCriss and chriscolfer ! Best ever!" the fans went crazy. Because that meant a Klaine duet. Which meant Klaine screen time.

She smirked. They had such a dedicated fan base. Their fans were so crazy, loving and amazing. Some quite scary. Chris got the tweet almost immediately.

" msleamichele hahaha stop being so sarcastic.."

Lea walked over to Chris and Darren. She laughed and sort of fell on Chris, putting a hand on his shoulder. "You two were great!" she smiled.

"I swear, by the end of the season we will have covered every Katy Perry and Pink song ever." Chris smirked.

"Pfft, probably." Lea giggled. "Come on, I think we have a scene soon." she tugged on Chris's arm and pulled him away.

Darren watched as Lea pulled Chris away. He didn't know what to do. He didn't have a scene yet. He had a bit of free time. He took out his phone and texted Mia.

**Hey you :) **Darren sent.

Mia replied almost immediately. **Hey dare :) hows it going over there? **

**Not to bad :) I have some free time. It's going pretty slow so far. **

**Thats good :D hey, I have to go to work, k? Bye, dare! 3 you!**

**3 you to Mia! Bye. Have fun at work. **

Shortest conversation he's ever had in his life. EVER. He needed someone to vent to.. someone he could trust not to judge or tell. Not Chris, he couldn't do that.. _I need new friends.._ thought Darren.

He began to make a mental list of people he could talk to.  
>Chris <em>no<em>  
>Joey <em>no<em>  
>Chuck <em>no<em>

Brian _no_

Lauren no

Mark _no_

_fuckity fuck fuck whats wrong with me? Fuck my life_ went through Darren's head.

"CHRIS!" he yelled. He caught up to Chris and Lea. Lea went on to talk to Ryan. "Hey, we should have a Disney marathon sometime. Like, you know. Just pop out the VHS player."

"Oh, my, god, we totally should. My place, tonight! And you can meet Brian!" Chris said excitedly. His voice went higher. The blue in his eye sparkled brightly.

Darren paused. "Who's... Who's Brian?" _please don't say boyfriend please don't say boyfriend _Darren repeated in his mind.

"The cat I just adopted! He's so cute." Chris smiled ear-to-ear. "You'll love him!" Chris's voice was high-pitched from excitement.

"Great! I can't wait to see him!" Darren smiled. _How am I gonna explain THIS to Mia? _Darren thought.

"He's so fat." Chris thought of his cat.

"He really is. I was there the other day and I was trapped for an hour. I couldn't lift him up!" Lea joined the conversation at random.

"It's true. I had to give him food so he would jump off her." Chris confirmed. 

Darren laughed. He imagined Lea being trapped by a fat house cat. It was hysterical. Only Lea..

Thinking about this, Darren realized that he was surrounded by wonderful people. But none were.. right. He needed someone he was super close with. But the only one that was.. was Chris.

Chris tried to read Darren. _What are you thinking?_ Chris thought. He often wondered what went through the mind of Darren Criss. Darren was his best-est friend ever. Well..Aside from Lea and Amber. His closest male friend. He was excited for the Disney Marathon. That's something he could never do with Amber or Lea. But Chris had more stuff planned for he and Darren...

Lea looked over her script as she watched Chris stare at Darren, and vice versa. "Well, it doesn't look like we have a scene until tomorrow. Buuttt we all have to go to dance rehearsal. Come on!" Lea said excitedly, trying to change the topic.

"Uh, We'll catch up. See you in a minute." Chris half smiled.

**Mind if I bring you lunch, babe?** Mia texted Darren.

**Uh, sure. I'm just near the auditorium. **Darren replied.

**Alright! I'll be right there. I'll bring your favourite.. **

**Awesome! Thanks! **

Just as Darren looked around for Mis, Chris trying to follow his eyes, Mia showed up. It was almost creepy how fast she was, but Darren thought nothing of it. He greeted her with a quick kiss on the lips.

Mia held out a brown paper bag. Old school, perfect. "I heard you were singing today. Thought you needed a little more than five gallons of coffee." Mia joked.

Darren giggled. "Hey, I eat! Oranges and stuff, but still." Darren opened the bag. In the paper bag was a home-made turkey sandwich. "A turkey sandwich? What' tho occasion?" Darren asked.

Mia's face fell a little when she realized Chris was right there. "Oh, hi, Chris." she smiled half heartedly. They shook hands.

"Hello Mia. How are you?" Chris smiled, trying to be real as possible. But he got the feeling Mia didn't like him very much.

"I'm good, thanks." She smiled.

Darren didn't catch on to any of this. He took a bite of the sandwich. "Mmmm... I love it." he spoke with his mouth full. He swallowed. "Oh, I uh, I won't be home tonight. I'm going to Chris's for the night."

Mia looked confused. She glared at Chris slightly. "Oh, we're just having a Disney Marathon and mot likely dinner." Chris confirmed.

"Yeah, we're just getting our childish selves on." Darren shrugged. What was wrong with having a Disney Marathon? Oh yeah, nothing.

"Um, okay. See you tomorrow, then?" Mia tried to make plans.

"Sure! Great!" Darren smiled. Mia leaned in and kissed him. Darren returned the favour. "See yah! Come on, Chris, we have dance rehearsal."

"Bye Mia," Chris smiled.

"Bye," she said coldly.

Darren continued eating his samich. Chris thought of what to say. He did want to say something. "So.. Mia seems to really like you." Chris said. He tried to like Mia, he really did. 

"Yeah, she's.. she's really great." Darren smiled through his mouth full of turkey sandwich.

"She also seems to not like me." Chris looked at the ground. 

Darren looked at Chris. According to Darren, Chris looked sad. "What makes you say that? It was just unexpected. I think she was just wanting us to..." 

"Okay, I think I understand." Chris didn't need the details.

Darren laughed, realizing what he had said. "Um... Mia doesn't hate you. Why would anyone do so? I mean... I think that friendship is more important than a relationship." Darren spoke from the bottom of his heart. "Yeah, Mia is a great girl and I love her but.. friendship is better. It always is." 

"Would you.. Nevermind..." Chris shook it away. 

"What? Tell me. You can tell my anything, you know that." Darren smiled. He offered a bit of his sandwich. It was a bit sandwich. Chris declined.

"Well.. Um.. Would you.. would you break up with Mia for.. for a friendship?" Chris asked. There was a silence. Neither men knew quite what to say. Chris felt he said something wrong.

Finally.. Darren spoke up. "It depends on the friendship. Why?" Darren asked. What Chris asking him to break up with Mia? 

"I.. I just want to know how much you like her. What kind of friendship?" Chris asked. They were almost at the Dancing Room.

"Pretty much all my college mates." Darren said openly.

"What.. what about ours?" Chris asked. He really was hating this conversations. _Can we just shut up and dance already? _He thought.

"Probably. I mean.. Why.. Are you asking me to?" Darren was super confused.

"No.. God no. I'm just a co-star. I could never stand between you and a relationship that might actually work." Chris sipped some more coffee.

"Well, I'd like to think you're a little more than someone I just work with." Darren shrugged his shoulders and opened to door to the dance studio for Chris. Chris nodded and said thank you.

_Is Darren Criss suggesting something? _Chris thought. "I guess. I mean-"

"Hey guys! Great. All of you are here. We gotta choreograph for Don't Stop Believing again. I'm sure you remember the moves, but lets go over them. 5,6,7,8!" Alex said, watching the cast dance.

Darren watched people dance then tried to join in. "Darren, Cory, like this. Uh, uh, step, step."

Darren picked up the dance moves quite quickly. Though Cory knew them, he still needed help. Two left feet, I guess.

"Like this?" Darren repeated the dance moves. 

Alex judged Darren. "Uh, that's right." Alex clapped his hands to get everyone's attention. "Everyone, dance with your character's date. This is just a goodbye song."

"Who do I dance with?" Dianna asked. She glanced at Lea.

"Oh, Samuel obviously." Alex said. He shrugged his shoulders. "Alright, from the top."

_

After Glee, Chris, Darren Dianna and Lea went out to Sushi. Darren was telling them about one time with Starkid when he was writing a song for Me And My Dick. Chris was giggling and laughing flirtatiously. Dianna and Lea were just looking at him like 'the fuck?" It was as if the two men had totally forgotten about the ladies at the table.

Lea and Di shared an avocado roll, while Chris and Darren got a Sushi Bento and shared it. No one was totally hungry, so they all shared practically. Darren held his chopsticks in a very feminine way. Lea took mental notes of everything. 

Dianna leaned over to Lea, "Darren.. he.. I think he's kinda gay." Dianna felt embarrassed say that about her friend, but she felt it was true.

"Oh, 100%." Lea agreed. "Wanna go? Leave these two to flirt." Lea scrunched her nose in an adorable way.

"Oh, definitely." The two girls left a 5 dollar bill on the table and went to a mall.

After the ladies left, Chris and Darren just stared into each other's eyes.. Blue hypnotized with hazel and vice versa, when two girls around 14 came up. "Are you Darren Criss?" said on girl who was kinda short. She wore a shirt that said "Keep Calm and Ride Unicorns." girl's eyes were huge. Terrifyingly big. But that might have been her nerdy-style glasses.

"I definitely am." Darren smiled.

"And are you Chris Colfer?" said the other girl, a bit taller. She wore a top that said "Screw This I'm Off To Pigfarts"

"I think I am.." Chris said jokinly.

"OH MY GOD LLAMAS!" yelled Gabrielle, the one wearing the Pigfarts shirt. "SIGN MY REDVINES!" she held out a package of Redvines and a Sharpie.

"Oh my gosh! Can I have one?" Chris asked, feeling someone childish.

"Have as many as you'd like!" Gabrielle said excitedly. Her blue eyes sparkled with happiness.

Callista, the girl with the Unicorn shirt, was speechless. She stood there, her mouth slightly ajar. "oh-" She cut herself off.

"Do you want a redvine?" Gabrielle offered to Darren.

"Sure. What the hell can't they do, right?" He took one and smile. He took the girl's sharpie and sighed the plastic wrapper. "Who should I make this out to?"

"Gabby! Or Gabielle. Whichever you prefer.." She said a bit loudly. Darren signed it saying "Happy Friday Gabrielle! From Darren Criss!" and passed the candy package to Chris, who did the same. Chris wrote on the other side, "To Gabby, Keep Shining! Love, Chris Colfer!"

Gabrielle elbowed Callista in the shoulder. "OH!" Callista randomly exclaimed. "Sign my Perry The Platypus Hat! Also I'm Callista" she had the biggest smile on her face. Callista took if off her head and passed it to Chris first. He wrote, "I dare you to smile bigger. From Chris Colfer"

Chris passed the hat to his co-star. Darren wrote. "Dream big! From Darren Criss"

"Omg! Thank you!" Gabrielle and Callista said in sync.

"I love you Harry. I love you Carson." Gabrielle sobbed. "Come on Quirrelle.. We're gonna scare them from their date.. I mean!"

"Gabby! Shut Up!" Callista elbowed Gabrielle in the stomach. Darren shifted in his seat and looked at Chris worriedly, who didn't return it. Chris just sat there, almost forcing a smile on his face to hide the awkwardness.

"Anyways... bye, Carson and Toby. Chris and Darren. Kurt and Blaine. We... We gotta go... Have a nice day.." Gabrielle said awkwardly and shuffled towards the door with Callista.

A few seconds later, Chris and Darren heard a light screaming sound. Chris laughed at them. "Lets go to our Disney Marathon, Toby." Chris joked. He threw a couple dollars on the table for a tip.

"Okay, Carson."

They drove to Chris' apartment and got ready to set up the Disney Marathon, watching each movie by date. Darren got the movies ready as Chris fixed them some drinks. He made butter beer, and put actual alcohol in it. Chris got into comfy clothes and lent Darren some sweats for the night.


	3. Chapter 3

**Sorry it took so long to update! I've had some help with this chapters and the chapters to some. My friend, Laura helped me. Actually she did most of the chapter.. anyways, follow her on twitter! ****Laurawallace17**

They drove to Chris' apartment and got ready to set up the Disney Marathon, watching the movies by each others favourites. Darren got the movies ready as Chris fixed them some drinks. He made butter beer, and put actual alcohol in it.

Both men started off on one side of the couch from Chris. Chris and Darren eventually ended up snuggling beside each other. Chris was to drunk to realize that Darren and him were cuddling. Somebody had too much butter beer...

Chris eventually fell asleep halfway through the marathon, so Darren turned it off. Darren snooped through some closets in the hallway until he found the linen closet and grabbed a blanket and a pillow for Chris ( being a great friend) and tucked Chris in. Darren then went to Chris's room, got unchanged and slept in his boxers.

Then next morning Chris let Darren sleep while he made food. When Darren woke up, he went out to see what Chris had made. When Chris turned around and realized Darren was only in his boxers he was shocked! He's never seen another co-worker or anyone really in boxers. Suddenly, things became very awkward very fast.

"Good morning!" Darren said excitedly with too much energy.

"Um... Morning... "Chris said a little awkwardly. Okay, maybe very awkwardly.

Darren walked up to Chris and watched him make whatever he was making. "What are you making?" Darren cocked his head to the side.

"I'm ... Uh ..just making pancakes before we go to work. Chris smiled

While Chris put out the plates Darren got ready for work. The two boys ate their food in silence and headed to work. When they arrived they walked in and got into character.

"DARREN! CHRIS get into costume, you two have a scene in 15 min!" Yelled Ryan.

Darren got into black skinny Capri's pant, a purple tucked in shirt, a yellow bow tie and got his hair gelled.

Darren went and got a coffee for him and Chris while Chris finished getting ready.

"Here you go Mr. Colfer." Darren shot Chris his million dollar smile.

"Thanks Darren!" Said in an almost sarcastically happy voice

"That was fun last night. I had a really great time." Darren said calmly.

Lea over heard Darren say that,so she came over to intrude. "What was fun last night?" Lea asked while giving a weird look to Darren.

"Oh! the Disney marathon we had last night." Chris said, purposely leaving out the staying overnight part.

Darren caught on fast and realized that Lea would bug them forever if she found out.

"Well Chris we should look over our lines." Darren suggested.

"Yeah...uh well we are first so lets start with that." Chris mumbled awkwardly.

"Okay. Great, so another kissing scene.. Okay you're on first." Darren

Chris read his lines and saw it said a 3 second kiss. He cleared his throat and made his voice a little higher. "I'm so glad we sorted everything out. I didn't sleep the same without our goodnight calls..

"I'm glad as well." Darren (as Darren not Blaine) looked right into Chris's eyes and went in to kiss Chris. It was way longer then 3 seconds. Darren slowly began to lick Chris's bottom lip until...

Mia walked in on them. Mia always seemed to come at the wrong times. It was like she had a thing. As if Mia's life goal was to stop Chris and Darren from their.. um.. 'acting'.

"Hey...uh Dare." She smiled the most fake smile on the planet. If there were awards for fake smiles to be given, she'd have them all. Get _all _the fake smile trophies!

Darren broke away from the kiss realizing Mia was there.

"Hey Mia!" Darren got up and hugged her quickly.

Mia kinda looked really pissed in Chris's eyes but Darren never noticed it. She just looked like his girlfriend.

"Well Mia we gotta go do our scene. Love you." Darren said walking away slowly.

Mia wasn't very happy. She didn't really like how close dare was with Chris, she felt like he was slipping away. She felt like she had to do something about it.

Okay... Action! Ryan yelled out!

Chris: "Blaine, I'll never _ever _say goodbye to you. I'm just glad we sorted everything out with that.. that.. with that thing." Chris smiled deeply into Darren's gorgeous, unusually coloured eyes.

Darren: "Good, because I won't let you. I'm glad we fixed everything too." said Blaine but Darren made it really romantic. Damn, those teenage girls must be freaking out now..

Darren leaned in to kiss Chris. Once again the kiss was longer then it was supposed to be.

"Cut!" Yelled Ryan. "That's a rap!" Ryan shouted after they re-did the scene over and over again.

Darren and Chris got up and walked of the set. Chris hurried away to his change room. Chris was confused. He really started to worries!

_Was I in love with Darren ? No no even if I was Darren's straight._ Chris thought. Chris really did feel something in that kiss. He didn't know what, and he didn't know why... He has kissed Darren many of times before. How could something suddenly change like that? He didn't know what to do so he tried to avoid Darren for a little.

Darren was feeling almost the same way. He was lost. He was thinking on calling Joey but it was to early to call him. Darren didn't know what to do.

Darren decided to call Joey anyway and at least leave a message. Joey didn't answer so Darren left a message

_"__Hey Joey it's Darren uh... Can we talk? I .. I need help again... Just call me when you get this okay bye!_" Darren hung up.

Darren decided to just lay-down and think. Tonight would be another long night with no sleep...


	4. Chapter 4

The day went very slow! It was the first day Darren and Chris didn't talk as much. Darren ended up falling asleep for a little bit. He really needed the sleep.

Darren's phone ended up going off. Darren didn't wake up until Chris came in!

"Darren! Wake up we need to rehearse for the group number!" Chris said very loud trying to wake him up.

"What? I'm up! I'm up!" Darren said, still half asleep.

"We need to get ready for the group number." Chris repeated.

"Oh... What time is it? How long was I asleep for? Where's my phone?" Darren asked worried

"Darren, you only slept for an hour, it's 2:30 and it's beside you." Chris answered his questions.

Darren looked at his phone and realized he had 10 texts and 5 calls! Joey had called 3 times and Mia called 2. Mia also texted Darren 8 times, one from Chris and one from Joey.

"Okay well let's go do that scene!" Darren said happily

Darren and Chris got up and started walking towards the artificial class room to film. But it wasn't a quiet walk.

"Darren Mia came by and she wasn't very happy...she seemed really mad." Chris told his coworker.

"Really? Why is that?" Darren asked, very confused. Mia was usually pretty nice.

"I don't know but she seems to not like me...I don't think she likes me.." Chris said a little upset.

They walked into the room were everyone was so they decided to continue the conversation later. It was an extremely awkward conversation and Chris didn't need the extra's tweeting or tumblring about their talks.

"Okay guys! Were going to nationals soon and we need a set list. I was thinking ..." Matt got cut off.

" I think I'm speaking for everyone when I say this but we should do something new! All the judges will get bored of us doing the same type of stuff. " Chris raised his hand as he spoke.

"Kurt your right! But what is that something new?" Matt asked

"CUT!" Ryan yelled. "Great job guys! Take a break! Two minutes!"

Darren went to his trailer to go call Joey when Chris came in. "Hey Darren... Can we uh.. Continue on our conversation from before?"

"Uh .. Yeah, sure" Darren looked Chris in his beautiful, aqua marine eyes. They looked exactly like Ariel's from The Little Mermaid.

"Do you think that Mia doesn't like me?" Chris asked nervously

"No! Well, I don't think so. why could anyone not like you? Your amazing! I can't see anyone not liking you!" Darren said with a huge smile. He spoke from the bottom of his heart.

"Okay..." Chris said looking still sad

Chris then left so he could talk to Lea while Darren called Joey

Darren called Joey an he answered!

"_Hey Joey can we talk?_" Darren asked confused

"_Yeah sure! What do u need?"_

"_Well...I don't know i kinda feel lost. I felt something really weird today. "__  
><em>  
>"<em>What did u feel?<em>"Joey asked

"_I.. I think I'm in love.." _Darren said. His voice was trembling.

_"Awe, I love you too." _said Joey. He could feel Darren roll his eyes on the other line. "_What's her name?"_

"_Chris." _Darren said in a hoarse whisper. Little did he know, that little trolling Llama was eavesdropping outside the trailer.

"_Awe, that's a nice name. It's kind of a boys name, don't you think? Oh well. It can be unisex i guess." _Joey heard the long, scarred, trembling sigh from the other phone. _"It's that your co-star, isn't it?" _Joey clued on.

"..."

"_Did you kiss him yet?_"

"_Well duh we kiss all the time on TV. It's 99% cut though. But today.. We were supposed to peck and then hug, but we kissed a bit longer. Like almost tongue but then Mia came and-_"

"_You're still dating that bitch? I thought you dumped her! She's so mean to all your friends._" Joey interupted. Good, it wasn't just Chris.

"_She's just.. protective. She also hate the fans but they hate her too, so.._" Darren shrugged. "_As I was saying, when we kissed before Mia came along, I felt something." _Darren admitted.

"_Hey! Hey Brian! Darren has this gay crush thingy on his co star. What should he do?" _Joey asked Brian Holden. Darren face-palmed. "_B-Hol says you should fuck him till he doesn't know his last name and I agree. Good luck with this gay chasing your best friend thing. I got to go. See yah!" _Well Joey was certainly useless.

Darren went to go talk to Chris before they started another scene again. Chris jumped to make it look like he was just walking past.

"Hey Chris what are you doing tonight?" Darren asked with a smile!

"Nothing really. Why?" Chris's heart was racing.

"Do you want to finish our marathon?"

S"ure see you tonight!" Chris said with a smile

As Darren went to go get his phone from his change room he ran into Mia .

"Oh hey Mia what's up?" Darren asked

"Can we talk?" She said a little mad, pissed off and hurt.

"Uh... Yeah sure but make it quick." Darren said confused

"Darren I'm not liking that your hanging out with Chris 24/7 so I'm making you chose.."

"Choose _what_?" Darren said. He was angry

"Me or Chris!". Ooh, this bitch was pissed

"Uhh... Well I don't like that your being like this Mia! It's rude! I don't like it! Why are you being like this?" Darren yelled.

"Because it's making you look gay! Your always hanging with Chris and I don't like Chris! So pick me or him?" She said a little loudly.

"Mia I'm sorry but I'm not going to do this so I guess... I guess were through!" Darren yelled

"Fine!" Mia stormed away

Chris came running over to ask what happened. "Darren what was that about?"

"We broke up!" Darren said pissed off

"Why? And why are you pissed?"

"Because she tried to make me pick between you or her! and there's no way I'd pick her! Shes just rude... Look Chris I'm sorry I didn't see that she didn't like you... Okay." Darren hugged Chris. It took Chris a second to hug back.

"Well it's okay as long as your okay!" Chris smiled. He patted Darren's back.

They both went to do their scene and then headed to Chris's house. It would be another _loooonnggg _night.


End file.
